You can’t start living your life in a meaningful way until you learn to like the entire person that you are. Liking yourself allows you to make personal life choices much easier because you trust yourself and your own judgments. You are confident that you have the capacity to create things or experiences you want not just for yourself but for the people you love.
How about trying these strategies to help raise your likeness for yourself and your personal self-esteem:
1. Be aware of your thoughts.
Notice the times of instances when you have negative thoughts about yourself. Learn to identify these situations wherein you tend to engage in “negative self talk” or putting yourself down. This way you can do something to immediately stop them and change the messages to positive ones of self-love and self-acceptance.
2. Tone down all the negative thinking.
Once you recognize the instances that trigger your negative thoughts, you can then stop these thoughts or at least try to transform them.
Learn to perceive the positives in an otherwise challenging situation. For instance, if you think you are socially unskilled, focus instead on helping others feel at ease with your presence or helping them open up to you by asking them about their job, school, or hobbies, etc. Most likely, you will find some commonalities with each other for a good conversation.
Or, you can also use imagery techniques such as imagining a “stop signal” so you can also tell yourself to “stop thinking negatively right now.” How about visualizing yourself at a beach or a peaceful dream house so you can feel more relaxed and self-assured?
Learning how to stop negative thinking helps boost your self-confidence and direct you to choose your own (positive) thoughts instead of dwelling in recurring unhealthy thought patterns.
3. With that said, accept both your positives as well as negatives.
Learning “personal acceptance” allows you to see everything in your life as a good balance that is helping you to be that special person that you are. Learn to accept the the least desirable aspects of yourself (your character traits you don’t particularly like) and view them as a reminder that you are perfect just as you are.
See (excellent resource): Whatever Arises, Love That: A Love Revolution That Begins with You
4. List your strengths.
Occasionally, reflect on the best things about yourself (what you are good at) because they help you see your worth as a person.
List down everything about you that you think you can do well such as your unique skills, secret talents, your generous acts, patience, etc. Write them all down. Keep adding to your list, grow it, and grow with it. Make it a challenge to add one personal strength of yours to your list monthly. You will notice that as your list grows, your positive thoughts/feelings about yourself also grows.
5. Be proud of your unique/quirky traits.
If you think you are the only one who can recite the alphabet backwards or memorize the chemistry periodic table of elements, be proud of it. That is what makes you a truly unique individual. Embrace your special talents no matter how quirky they may seem to others.
6. Focus on doing your best.
Though it is good to be aware of your not-so-talented sides and learn to accept them, it is also great to focus on your skilled sides because they will help drive you to keep moving forward. They will help you excel, do your best, not give up, and continue working hard to accomplish all your goals.
7. Do the things YOU want to do.
It is a fact—life is more fun when you get to choose to do the things you want. Instead of doing the things your parents want for you do or what your friends think you ought to do, search within your heart and see what it is you really want to do in your life. Then, just go for it.
8. Each morning, set an intention to accept yourself.
Set an intention each day that no matter what arises and no matter what you do or don’t do, that it is okay. That you will be pleased with yourself regardless. This doesn’t mean that you don’t strive to do better, it just means that you find peace in what is. You will be surprised at how helpful this tip can be at learning to like yourself.